>The Great Quail, as he is now known, has created life similarly on many continents and >incontinence, as he is known for his Quailspew far and wide. Many people who like him or don't >were actually offwardly sprung by him.

This is true. In my case, a small glitch in the operating system caused a disorder of the optical muscles known as congenital strabismus: i.e. I was born cross-eyed. (I have pictures to prove this.) When I was brought home from the hospital, twenty-six years ago, I caught a glimpse of Nixon making a campaign speech on TV, distorted due to my eye disorder into a creature of even greater horror and hideousness. "FTHAGN CTHULHU!" I screamed in utter anguish. "IA IA MILHOUSE!" But nobody understood me, since I had no teeth.

Naturally, I subconsciously blamed the Quail for this vision of evil, as well I might. Even though the strabismus was eventually surgically corrected, a deep and abiding horror of the Grateful Dead had already been implanted in my infant brain. The neural short-circuiting resulting from my vision of Nyarlothemilhouse was what gave me the ability to shape
tin-foil in myriad forms: but at what cost?

I thank you all for your birthday wishes, and I am especially grateful for the naked mole-rats that Dolph sent (who are, as everyone knows, animal representatives of the Friends of Feg), but I fear it may be too late for me.

n.